Fangirls
EPISODE 1
written by
Marie-Claire Gould
Date: November 1, 2018
Episode 1
INT. LOCATION ALLY’S HOUSE – EVENING – AFTER THE EVENINGS ADVENTURE IS DONE.
Ally is recording a Vlog. She is speaking to the audience. We can hear internal sounds of the house. The whirr of the computer.
Ally
Fandom is a funny thing, it shifts over time, especially with something as ambitious as Star Wars to stay relevant it has had to change. I’m going to get a little personal on today episode.
But…FIRST. SERIOUSLY. How was I supposed to know this would happen? I had never seen Fanboys. You know that feeling when you you can’t possibly live the embarrassment down. Also does anyone out there know how to get vomit out of suede? Comment below the video….
(Intro music)
Lady narrator
These Fangirls – Love Star Wars
Ext. Allyway.
Two people are walking along a gravel back alley way. The girl Ally is on the phone as she first starts speaking with her friend Kristy. The boy – is walking ahead to his place. Ally occasional stumbles.
Ally
No.. I left the bar with this guy.. Yeh I’m going to a guy’s house to watch a movie or something.
Kristy
(through the Phone **Mumbling that sounds like**)Oh my god, Ally what the hell?!
Ally
Kristy.. I’m going to be totally safe! I’m just checking in so you know where I am.
Boy
Hey, Ally! Down this alleyway – are you done with your phone call?
Ally
Almost! …
kristy
*mumbling female voice – “Pin your location so I can call the cops if you disappear into his Red Letter media basement”*
Ally
(To phone) Fine.. Love you.
Phone setting sounds. Puts phone away, runs on gravel to catch up with boy.
ALLY
(To Boy) All done, are we almost there?
Boy
This way, … that bar sure played terrible music.
Ally
Mmmmmmm it will be nice to get a drink that doesn’t cost 8 bucks. Ug.
Boy
I can’t believe you are as big a fan as you are and you have never seen Fanboys… Oh can we be quiet going in? My roommate goes to bed super early.
Boy unlocks and opens a door and walk through a house, going down stairs making some bumping noises. Change from ext night to main house with change from living room to kitchen to stairs to basement
INT. HOUSE – MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT –
Ally
Wait which way..
Boy
Shhh this way..
Ally
Oh of course, Nice living room up here. I guess I always saw the saga with my family so not a lot of opportunity to check out fan culture.
Boy
Oh it’s great, there is a drinking game we can play if you are up for it. We drink every time there’s a Star Wars reference. My place is in the basement.. mind your head.. I don’t want to turn on the lights.
They are walking through a hall and the Boy closed the Door Behind Ally and flips on a light.
Ally
**Whispering** nice place..
Boy
We can speak normally now.. Welcome to my humble abode..like Tequila? Let me get the movie set up. I have it on DVD over here.
Ally
Here hand me the bottle! Let’s take a shot to start…
We hear a DVD going into the player-slot, and a drink is being poured. The remote getting put down. Settling into a couch.
Ally and Boy
Cheers
Shot glass clink
Boy
Prepare to be mind blown
Swallow sounds
Boy
So we drink when there are Star Wars references and we take a shot when they insult each other.
Shifting and Sitting setting noises as the they move closer in the next few lines
Boy
You cold? I could get you a blanket or something
ALLY
Here just move closer
Boy
Oh, okay. I’ll start the movie.
Music from the movie, Clinking shot glasses pouring swallow couch move
Ally
I guess the Anticipation is similar to Episode 9 now I am counting down the days!
Boy
Exactly! We were waiting for the Return.
Ally
Is that the only girl? Oh my god its Kristen Bell I loved her in Frozen.. She is great in the Good Place! Ha Blue Period. I love her!
Boy
Yea she is great.
Pick up shot glass clicking and filling with bottle.
Ally
Well this hasn’t aged well – who wrote this…
ALLY Picks up the case inspecting it.
ALLY
Wow Ernest Cline.. had a movie recently didn’t he.
Clink
Boy
Yes! Ready Player one.. This is Star Wars isn’t it? I mean friends hanging out together, busting each other?
Clink
ALLY
Yea. I have some friends I watch Star Wars with.. it’s fun. So they want to see The Phantom Menace?
Pouring clink swallows, speech becoming more slurred**
Boy
I remember when I saw this for the trailer for this for first time, I was so excited. I guess I’m a little older than you. I remember what a disaster the Prequels were. Oh Ally, Hun, you don’t need to drink at the Star Trek references
Ally
Now they are fighting with Star Trek fans? I know so many Star Trek fans. They Like Star Wars too.
Boy
Yes, I’m not sure how much but it’s based on a true story.. even though the Phantom Menace ended up being terrible, but I guess it wasn’t as bad as attack of the clones.
Ally
Oh, I actually really like the Prequels. They were my first Star Wars movies.
Boy
I guess you never had a chance to be a true fan then. I’m just happy you are here.
Ally
(Awkward laugh/giggle)
Boy
I’m sure you have seen the good ones…
Ally
Why is that guy such an asshole?
Boy
Oh drink! Shh this is the best part.
Ally
(Slurred Speech) Where’s your bathroom I needs to pee.
Boy
Just around the corner.. Want me to pause it?
Door closes..Stumble stumble, toilet lift, Vomits watery sound. Ally cleans her self up.
ALLY
uggg blah….
Water running sound, Door opens…
Ally
Ug I think I need to head home
Boy Stands, Couch shift noise
Boy
Are you alright?
Sound of stumbles as Ally leaves the bathroom area, boy stands from couch and walks towards her.
Ally
I’m just not feeling well, I should really go…
Boy
It’s almost 4 am… you are welcome to spend the night.
Sound of a jacket being put on, sound of a purse being collected. Ally is speaking much too loudly
Ally
No I need to work in the morning.
Ally finishes collecting her things and make her way back to the door. Boy follows his way to the door
Boy
Well I hope you make it home safe, I’ll give you a call tomorrow, here let me give you a hug. It’s so awesome you’re a big Star Wars fan..
Awkward hug.
ALLY
(Awkward) Right well I gotta go…
EFFECT: Walking up the stairs, stumble ALLY grunts. Seemingly taking a long time
Ally
Was this the way out?
Ally Stumbles, bumping into things.
Mother
The girls he brings home aren’t usually so noisy.
Ally
Gebus you scared me. Wow it’s early I didn’t realize I woke you up. I am so sorry to wake you up… his older… fully dressed… drinking coffee in the middle of the night roommate.
Coffee cup bumps down on the table
Mother
Roommate? I’m his mother… feeling guilty?
Squeaky chair as she moves forward.
Ally
(Aside whisper) Guilty? What is this American Gothic? (to the Mother) I can barely see you, let me just turn on this light.
Effect: light switch on, buzz of a light blub.
Ally
Oh gebus Judy…Ms. Franklin! What the hell are you doing here?
Mom
Well since this is my house, and that is my son I should really be the one asking you that…
Ally
Oh my god, I am so sorry that I did things…
Mom
To my son
Ally
No… Miss Franklin I…
Mom
I don’t think you need to come in to work tomorrow. Or ever again.
Ally
B-but I… this shouldn’t mean..
Mom
I think you should be heading home.
Ally
Right, .. ah I am so sorry.. I’ll go.
Effect: screen door opening, Ally’s next line delivered on the way out.
Ally
Thank you for your Tequila and sorry about the bathroom
Mom
Sorry about my what??!
Ally
Oh shit!
Effect: running, creak of a yard gate, ally breathing hard. running down gravel, Fade in music and opens to frantic, Transition to Typing
Kristy
Seriously just log on to Discord. Do it Ally!
More Frantic typing then the sound of a Boop Boop – to join a conference call.
Ally
Hi… Kristy..
Kristy
Well you sound like death, put on your camera so I can see the disaster you are.
BOOP of screen share
Kristy
Well you look horrid… was it as bad as you posted about?
Ally
Worse, I vomited on my shoes when I got halfway down the alleyway.
Kristy
I’m glad you Ubered home I was about to drive to pick you up. I would vomit too.. playing a Fanboys drinking game.
Ally
It was made at a different time, things have changed… Also you might need to forget you are a woman for five minutes to enjoy it.
Kristy
Snort laugh, Should I distract you with the newest leak I heard?
Ally
Oh please no… I don’t know if I can handle another German to japanese to English translation of a magazine article.
Kristy
This one really seems real this time, there are photos. Also more information on the Shows. I know you would like that Red Viper venom – mmhmmm Oberyn Martell..
Ally
Kristy Stop…..
The sound of another person joining Boop boop
Danielle
Hey Ladies!
Ally
(Sounding hungover and depressed) Hey dani
Danielle
Oh shit what’s wrong
Kristy
Ally attempted to date again, from a bar…
Danielle
But what happened – even with the screen glare you look like death Ally
Ally
It’s too embarrassing, I did get to see Fanboys though…
The sound of another person joining Boop boop
Ally
Oh hey Lexy joined!… still no mic and camera hey? No no it’s okay, it’s tough going to school and being able to afford to fix those. Let me turn on Text to voice like last time.
Type beep noise – Lex’s voice is played by a Siri sounding voice for the whole scene.
Ally
There we go try it now!
Robot voice for Lex:
Hey girls
Danielle
Fanboy’s has.. not aged well. Hey Lexy…Are we still planning on watching The Last Jedi? I’ll get it queued up. But I expect more details on the date while I load things.
Robot voice for Lex
Wait what date? When? Who? Is it serious?
Ally
No Lexy it isn’t serious.. I just.. vomited all over myself. And I think I lost my job..
Danielle
Wow how did you manage that? I’m not sure whether to be impressed or pity you because you will never get over the rut you have been in… *Pop lips*
Robot voice for Lex
Did you sleep together? I thought you weren’t interested in anyone.
Ally
Lexy, no I did not have sex with him, we barely managed to get through the movie. By the way – How does it end.. Does the guy get to see it?
Robot voice for Lex
Ugg Patricharichy in action
Kristy
Oh yea he gets to see it. No Lexy it doesn’t represent the patriarchy.. I made sure Ally sent me her location so I could call the cops. But the worst thing she ran into was a light model of Norma Bates… also Ally’s boss.
Robot voice for Lex
What the heck happens, when I’m not around? Ally what the heck?
Ally
Thanks Kristy like I’m not embarrassed enough.
Daniella
Wow, your luck with guys is really terrible. Like what is this the 3rd, 4th date that has ended in a disaster? I mean I think vomiting on yourself and getting fired at the same time takes it but what is going on with you Ally?
Robot voice for Lex
How am I supposed to sleep now knowing you vomit all over people and get fired when I do.
Ally
No seriously Lexy, I’m fine… Dani….Please stop worrying hun.
Robot voice for Lex
Come closer to the camera so I can see you are fine.
Mic movement closer
Ally
SEE I’m Fine, thank you for worrying, I just need to figure out what to do now.
Danielle
The movie’s ready to go.. Where is Rish?….
Robot voice for Lex
I’ll DM her.
Danielle
Thanks Lexy
The sound of another person joining Boop boop
Kristy
Seriously, i can’t believe that guy treated you like that..
Ally
Like what?
Kristy
Questioning your fan status, does he not know about your Youtube Channel?
Rish
Hello Ladies!!
Kristy
Hey Rish
Danielle
Hi Dear!
Ally
(still Sounding tired and sad) Hi…
Rish
Whoa whoa what is going on Al are you okay, who do I need to fight?
Robot voice for Lex
Some guy, called Ally not a real fan, or didn’t think the prequels were good? I don’t know, Get her to tell the whole story Please.
Rish
Lexy wait what? Ally… What happened? Are you okay?
Ally
I’m fine… Ladies stop worrying, I just had a bad date, watched three quarters of Fanboys, Vomited all over his bathroom, met his mother, who was not his roommate, who was actually my boss, who then proceeded to fire me and I just want to curl up and watch Star Wars with my best lady friends in the world finish this bloody mary, and get over this hangover… Remind me to never have tequila again..
Robot voice for Lex
Never have tequila again.
Ally
Funny lexy at least I didn’t drink the worm..
Danielle
Eat the worm, how do you drink a worm… Okay okay pressing play
Opening blast of Main theme….fades out
ALLY
*HEAVY SIGH* I just wish we could all be in person… you know Watching this? Or Episode 9?
Robot voice for Lex
I wish I could be with you all and especially you Ally
Ally
Me too Lexy..we could cuddle in on the couch and drink wine!
Robot voice for Lex:
Heart Emoji
Danielle
That would seriously be the best. I know no one in my home town that loves star wars I always need to drive to cons.
Kristy
You all are so great.
Robot voice for Lex
I am so lucky to have you all, these watches keep me going through art school.
Ally
We are lucky to have you too Lexy, oh! did you finish your final project?
Robot voice for Lex
Yup! And I can’t wait to get back to drawing reylo.
Ally
You still owe me Reylo babies.
Robot voice for Lex
I’ll start tomorrow. Blow kiss emoji.
Kristy
Ally you are right… we really all should try to get together for Episode 9. Like meet in the same city. Have a Tea Party in person… Enjoy what JJ Abrams will feed us.
Danielle
December… feels so far away…recently I had a terrible dream, that I fell in a coma and woke after the premiere of Episode 9…
ALLY
I would give anything to see Episode 9 right now. Just to know how it resolves. Know what happens. Then I can die happy.
Robot voice for Lex
Me too, anything…
Danielle
RIGHT that would be amazing, where is my time machine..
Rish
I was literally just having this conversation with a mutual.. And they said they heard a rumor of a showing in 3 days from now. Real hush hush.. But that they know a family friend of JJ’s. You remember with 7 there was that screening in the arizona town the one from Super 8… Well my friend J G L_fan.. Said they heard, in honor of Rose Gilbert – that teacher of JJ’s that inspired Maz Kanata – that there will be a screening at Palisades High School in Los Angeles in 3 days… Like I was skeptical but this actually sounds like something JJ would do.
Silence ..
Rish
What?
ALLY
Are you kidding me?
Rish
No this is what my friend said… it sounds so real.
Silence
Danielle
We.. should do this.. We should go see this movie… I could hit up the con is Las Vegas on the way! It’s this weekend… I just need to figure out my son…
Kristy
What drive across the country?
Ally
Well.. I have nothing to lose.
Robot voice for Lex:
Wait.. What?
Rish
I think I know the time. And my next shift isn’t until next week. Lexy, come-on, you finish your final project .. We come and pick you up Ally and Kristy Live near each other, then pick up Dani and I. When else would we have the opportunity to experience this? ….
Robot voice for Lex
I don’t think I can go… I need to go visit my grandma. I have a super busy weekend
Ally
Come on Lexy – let’s do this.! Your final project is done. I’m sure your grandma will understand.
Robot voice for Lex
She is sick.
Kristy
So.. are we doing this? I don’t mind picking you all up just chip in for gas money.
Ally
Oh you have to go! Come on Lexy look at this pouty lip and puppy dog eyes, I’ll pay for your share of the gas money – I just want you there lex!
Robot voice for Lex
I really gotta go…now. Bye all.
Ally
Okay okay I’ll talk to you…
Sound of someone leaving the chat BOOP BOOP – Sad Boop.
Ally
Later…
Kristy
So.. we are going to do this!
Danielle
30 hours from you Kristy.. And there is tons of Construction. Are you sure we can make it? That’s interesting the route goes straight through Las Vegas.
Kristy
Yup! Ooooo, maybe we can pick up something at the outlet mall. I love a good deal! So here is what I’m thinking, I’ll get Ally and then pick up Rish in Chicago, then head to you in Lincoln. The most Epic of Road TRIPS!
Ally
WOW, I have never been to California before! Can we go to Disneyland?
Kristy
This is the trip of a lifetime, the chance for adventure, and most importantly to see episode 9 before anyone and with all of you!
Ally
It’s a shame Lexy can’t make it. I’m going to message her, maybe I can convince her to come.. She is just in Denver right?
Kristy
Yes, I have her address – I sent her a card for her birthday.
Ally
Yea, I have it too, from when I had the buy one get one free Reylo pillow deal. We should at least Drop by.
Rish
We are going to do this!!!
Transition to vlog.
